vox
by Denwa
Summary: Nine things that Uchiha Sasuke knows but would not say for the world. [Sasuke, Naruto.]


**vox;**  
written by Denwa.

_and (t)his vanity requires (no) response (from you)_—  
(nine things that uchiha sasuke knows but would not say for the world.)

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**1.** He is, frankly, very aware, very clear (on), of the fact that he does not grow anymore. Has been this tall (short? He is short for his age—he assumes—) for fourteen months. Has been 173 centimeters tall (short? It is short, in—the depths of—his mind) for fourteen months (it—is—very—disenchanting.

Disheartening—

… His vocabulary is like—like sharpened. Sharpened rocks. Chipped jewels. Hardened magma. Once burning, burning, burning—like fire! Explosions! Fireworks! Lights! Gone. Gone, gone, gone.—but cooled down to only a sliver of what is left. The debris is gone. The anger is gone. All is left is cold endurance. Can you breathe now? He hopes you can. He hopes you can watch him grow stronger by the moment, moment, moment. He hopes you can still breathe. So he asks, "Can you breathe now? Can you all breathe now?")

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**2.** And knows his heart is only like the size of Mizu no Kuni before the _Bang!_ happened. He is quite aware of that. (Please do not disturb him. Please do not wake him. Please do not tell him. You will shrink it to the width of Naruto's whiskers multiplied by the square root of negative four.)

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**3.** But as far as he is concerned, it does not matter.

Because he is a boy (or, very, very, very young man) the age of sixteen (who is only 173 centimeters tall-short-tall, but please do not rub it in like running alcohol down exposed, bleeding flesh). He is allowed to sin once in a little while. A little, little while. Just a little bit. He is allowed to be greedy, selfish, harmful, sinful, extravagant, graceless, wet-behind-the-ears. Everyone needs to fall.

(Once a while.

Even him.)

And, oh, poor him; got his parents killed, got his brother to run, got himself to run, got his best friend to go crazy (or as crazy he can get because Naruto started off as crazy, anyways), got his other friend to go crazier than his best friend (Naruto? He's pretty crazy. Sakura? Please do not speak to her).

Falling is not ripping wings away from someone.

Falling is realizing that someone is terribly, terribly wrong.

(It's very disenchanting, disheartening, disappointing—because all these words that sound so negative are getting to him.)

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**4. **Uchiha Sasuke is tired.

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**5.** (Tired of chasing after maybes.

And tired of seeing Itachi's face.

And tired of running away from futures because the future does not interest him. Only the past does.

And is angry when he sees the character of "fox" behind Itachi's throne.)

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**6. **And there are only three properties of ionic compounds: crystal shape, high melting points, and electrical conductivity. Orderly, three-dimensional arrangements formed by ions are called crystals. Every ion in an ionic compound is attracted to ions near it that have an opposite charge. Positive ions tend to be near negatively-charged ions, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera (the book is every dull on the aspect of how to explain things properly.)

At room temperature, ionic bonds are strong enough to cause all ionic compounds to be solids.

(And so, it is very clear to him that he and Naruto were never really warm.

But now it's okay.

Now it's okay.)

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**7.** Dialogue is unnecessary for this kind of moment—one of those triumphant (—very tired—) moments in which the hero of the story stands in front of his (beloved, beloved, beloved) rival and they pull out their weapons (he does not flinch in any way when he looks at his sword for guidance) and crouch down low to fight.

(So no one dares speak? So no one dares say, "Oh, how you've grown" or "Oh, how I've missed you."

For he missed Naruto.

Missed him many, many, many times.)

Since when has he felt so tired? Since when has he felt like this—"Momento mori! Memento mori!"—like text flying everywhere in different colors like forensic science gone askew in the making of history written boldly and heavily on quickly (haste! Haste! His—friend—moves swiftly and silently and deadly and, oh, he is so swift) yellowing parchment made from bamboo. Reeds. Bamboo reeds—was that it? Does the Nakano River dare remind him of something lost so long ago? (Does he miss his _brother's_ best friend? Not this boy who is trying to cut him. For this boy is Naruto. For this boy makes people smile like there is nothing one can do about it.)

Shisui was difficult.

And he does not let one more thing pass (something like "Fear of death by water"?) on by, his blood (diluted by the rainwater falling everywhere—his eyes, filling his mouth like it had a mind of its own and was about to choke him with insane delight) was pink (a gash near his waist and he realizes how skinny he is).

173 centimeters tall-short-tall. (He snorts.)

Naruto was 175.

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**8. **No spiral notebook of his own? How sad.

(Buy one, argues his mind. Go on and buy one.)

And—

HURRYUPPLEASEITSTIME.

"Time for what?"

PLEASEGOPLEASEGOPLEASEGO.

"Pray tell, where should I go?"

GOGOGOGOGO.

"Goodbye, then."

PLEASECLOSETHEDOORONYOURWAYOUT.

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**9. **("I will.")

The lights shut off.


End file.
